Father Material
by Kreuger2
Summary: A conversation between Sam and Dean - don't want to give too much away although the title sort of does...
1. Chapter 1

This is my first post ever, I have a habit of leaving my stories unfinished but this one wouldn't let me go!

I don't own anything, seriously, nothing!

It was forty five minutes after leaving that Sam caught up with him. They had been in town for less than 24 hours but leave it to Dean to find the nearest bar. In the time it had taken Sam to catch up with him Dean had managed to drink two beers, a purple nurple and was now on to the hard stuff. Sam spent a second just taking in his countenance before he went to the bar, ordered his own beer and then joined his brother at the table.

"So, you gonna tell me what happened back there?" Dean just glared at his brother. "I've never seen you go off like that."

"I just wanted him dead Sammy." The demon they had been fighting was nothing out of the ordinary for the two of them, so this reply was not enough to satisfy Sam.

"We want them all dead Dean, that's what we do. What's so different about this one?"

Dean had finished his whisky and was ready for the next one. Without answering the question he rose from his seat and headed for the bar, he returned this time with a beer and a whiskey. He considered moving to another table but he knew his brother would just follow him.

Once he was sat back down Sam tried again. "What happened back there Dean? Why this one?"

"It's not just this one Sam, it's all of them. I want them all dead." He took a sip of his beer. "I want them all gone." A sip of his whiskey, he said no more.

Sam knew there was more to this than Dean was letting on, he also knew there was no way he was going to get it out of his brother before he was ready. Instead he went back to the bar and got himself another beer. He was willing to wait this one out.

For nearly twenty minutes they said nothing, Dean went back to the bar and got another beer, Sam just waited. Finally Dean had had enough to say what was on his mind.

"Jo's pregnant." Those two words served as all the explanation Sam was going to get unless he was willing to probe some more.

"Dean that's great!" He took in Deans expression. "Isn't it?"

"How can I father a child knowing what's out there? Isn't it kinda irresponsible?"

"Dean if is wasn't them it would be something else. Murderers and rapists, haven't you given enough to this world? It's time to start living your life."

"I can't stop hunting Sam."

"I'm not asking you to."

They say nothing for a few moments before Dean begins again. "I just keep thinking about dad you know? About us without him. If I keep hunting there's a chance I could get killed and I'd be leaving my child without a father. Knowing that's a risk how can I go through with this?"

"If you weren't hunting it would be something else. You could get pulled under a bus tomorrow."

"C'mon Sammy, you know doing what we're doing that there's more chance of us getting killed than normal people."

"Dean don't you think that as a father, knowing what's out there it would be more responsible to go after them than not to?"

"We'll never get them all Sam." He drains the rest of his beer. "What about Jo? I'd never really considered a future together, it's not like I've ever considered marriage and settling down. It's not who I am." He gets up to get another beer, "You want another?"

"Sure." Sam considers his brothers words while he is at the bar. Dean was always the outsider. Sam was much more the social animal than his brother ever was, he had always assumed that was just the way he was. He had never considered that maybe he wanted more. He remembered his childhood spent on the roads, Dean looking after him for days at a time. He never once complained, he's said it many times since, it was his job. From the moment Sam was born Dean considered it his responsibility to look after him. Sam remembered the ways he had made Dean suffer, he didn't like the way that they lived and at times he would take that out on Dean. Dean had accepted his lot in life without comment, he did whatever his father had asked of him, and even now he would do whatever it took to protect his brother.

Dean returned from the bar with two more beers he sat without saying anything, it was unusual for Dean to reveal as much of his thoughts as he had this evening and he was feeling a little drained. Sam tried to consider the right words to say to his self sacrificing brother.

"Dean how do you feel about Jo?" This was broaching entirely new territory for the brothers. Sam was the one who loved women, Dean was the one that left them.

"I don't even know how to answer that Sam. I care about her, you know that much, it's not like I've ever been in love before, I have nothing to compare this too."

"But you think it might be love?" He latched onto that, love wasn't something Dean ever talked about, to even use the word was a great indicator of his feelings toward the lady in question.

"I don't know, I… I'm getting tongue tied Sammy. I think about her, a lot. When were together I'm happy and comfortable and when we're not I can't stop thinking about her. What is she doing? What is she wearing? Is she hunting? I hope to God she's not hunting, not without me, not without someone watching her back. She thinks she can do it all, but underneath it all she is so fragile. I just want to protect her, I never want to let anything bad happen to her, and part of me knows that sooner or later I'm going to break her heart. I'd hate myself for that."

Sam just breaks out into a huge grin, "Do you realise that is the most you have ever said, about anything? Mr stoic finds his voice."

"I think I love her Sam."

"I think you do too." At that moment REO Speedwagon comes on the jukebox and the brothers just look at each other, they start laughing and Sam gets out, "Well if that isn't a sign then I don't know what is." They laugh harder, before eventually gaining control of themselves. "What does this mean for the baby?"

Dean becomes sombre again, "It doesn't change anything, I'm not father material Sam."

"Bullshit." They both pause at Sam's use of such a profanity, neither of them were expecting such a response.

Once he's regained his composure Dean starts again. "Look at how much you resented dad for the childhood you led. I can't do it any better, I can't stop fighting, not knowing what's out there. I'm not exactly living my life by the law either, however you look at it I can't give either of them a proper life."

"You can love them Dean, and you can protect them." Dean tries to say something but Sam raises his hand to stop him, "Look at the way you've protected me, from the moment I was born you have been my guardian, you can do that for your child. You will do that without even trying, you will do it because despite what you think you are a good guy with a big heart just waiting for someone to let you love them. Who better than Jo? She knows what we do, knows how important it is because she does it too. She even seems to like your arrogant side, and shares your taste in music."

They both laugh at that, "She is pretty perfect that way." Dean takes another sip of his beer, "You know it's speeches like that that make people think that we're gay."

Sam bursts out laughing, "Shut up."

Has been written as a oneshot with the possibility of a further chapter with Dean and Jo... Let me know if you want it.


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning Dean woke up with a headache, but it was nothing a hearty breakfast couldn't cure. He went out to the diner across the street from the motel where Sam was waiting for him, already half way through his own breakfast.

"Morning sunshine! Can I get you a hair of the dog?" Sam couldn't hide the smile on his face and Dean would swear it was smug.

He just grimaced in reply and threw Sam the keys to his car, "You're driving today."

They had nothing on the cards for the next couple of days, demon activity seemed to be slow lately something that had Sam worried and Dean relieved. Sam was convinced there was some big time planning going on. Dean was of the opinion that even if this was the case they wouldn't be able to get to the bottom of it. Demons weren't exactly open about their plans, all they could do was be ready when the time came. In the mean time Dean was enjoying some down time.

They were heading back to the Roadhouse that day, they had done what they came to do and after the previous night Dean was anxious to get back to Jo. He still wasn't quite sure about the future that lay ahead of him but he knew that Sam was right. He had spent his whole life looking after others and it was time to put his own desires first, if he could just figure out what they were. He would do whatever it took to protect his brother, he always had, and he knew that he would do the same for anyone else he had in his life. That was the best that he could do, and he figured that was enough. It was what his father had done for them, he had spent his life trying to be just like his father, and now he had the chance to prove just how close he'd come to achieving that.

They got an early start and were back to the Roadhouse by dinnertime. Ellen had a small menu she served for the various hunters that passed through there and Dean had his heart set on a good old fashioned burger. When they got inside there were a few familiar faces, a few unfamiliar faces, and Ellen behind the bar.

She had her back to the bar so didn't see their approach, as she turned she spoke. "What can I get you boys? Oh it's you two!"

"Lovely seeing you too."

"Sam how you doin'?" She asked choosing to ignore Deans comment.

"I'm good thanks, any chance you could rustle us up one of your finest?" He said with that smile Dean envied. When it came to charming the opposite sex Dean was the one with the gift, Sam was bumbling and clumsy whereas Dean just exuded charm. His cocky smile bordered on outright arrogance, but combined with his sexy blues and his Devil may care attitude women couldn't resist him. Parents on the other hand were less charmed, and Ellen was no exception. It wasn't that she didn't like Dean, on the contrary, since they had started coming round she had grown to care about the sons of a man who was once her friend. Still that didn't mean she was happy about the obvious connection between him and her daughter. Dean was well aware of this, and was sure if he were able to smile at her in that way Sam had that made parents fall at his feet, he would be able to make Ellen a lot more comfortable with him.

"Sure thing sweetie. That two?" She directed this last part at Dean who just nodded appreciatively. "Jo around here somewhere?"

"She headed down to the store about half an hour ago, she should be back any minute. Can I get you guys a beer?"

Dean glanced to the door distracted as he waited for Jo's arrival so Sam answered for them, "That'd be great thanks."

She handed them a beer each and Sam handed over some cash, they were always careful at the Roadhouse to pay in cash. Were they ever caught for their credit card fraud they didn't want to implicate Ellen and so they always made sure they had some cash on them. They headed over to a table where Dean sat facing the front door. They said nothing, as constant companions they were quite used to comfortable silences after all there was only so much they could talk about. Instead Sam just sat drinking his beer and watching his brothers' discomfort as he waited for Jo to arrive.

Their burgers had arrived by the time she got back so Dean didn't see her come in, she noticed him but just walked right past. They hadn't spoken since her announcement that she was pregnant and she wasn't really sure what to expect. He hadn't exactly taken the news well. They hadn't formally been in a relationship, they had had a couple of dates, nothing glamorous, and they had spent a few nights together. She had felt that they had both wanted more than this but they didn't exactly live the kind of lives that lent themselves to normal relationships.

She went to the back and gave her mom the supplies she had got from the store, salt and some water, essentials in a bar filled with hunters. "How long have them two been here?" She hadn't intended to tell her mother about her pregnancy, but she never was very good at keeping secrets.

"They got here about 20 minutes ago, you want me to ask them to leave?"

"No," She sighed, "I've got to face him sooner or later."

The night she told him was pregnant was the night before he headed out on his last hunt. He had been staying in a motel nearby the Roadhouse and Jo had been staying with him. The only time they ever spent the money on an extra room was when Jo was with Dean, after all that was not a scene Sam wanted to be part of. They would have stayed at the Roadhouse but despite Jo's best efforts Dean was still afraid of her mother, a mother with a shotgun was a mother he wanted to keep on side.

They were in bed when Jo finally plucked up the courage to tell him, She really wasn't sure what kind of reaction she was going to get from him, she sensed that he cared about her, he was surprisingly tender when they were together, but fathering a child with her was a little sudden. She knew this, she even agreed but having an abortion was not something she was even willing to consider. It's not like she was on the side of pro-life, it just wasn't something she could do. This decision was the easiest thing she faced once finding out she was pregnant, the hardest, was telling the father.

To give him his due he took the news better than she was expecting, that wasn't to say he took it well. He raised his voice only once during the ensuing discussion, it was not this that bothered Jo, but his uncertainty. Her absolute willingness to devote the rest of her life to this child was balanced by his absolute unwillingness. They had only a short argument before Jo left the motel for her home, she hadn't spoken to him since then.

She waited until he appeared to have finished eating before she came back out into the bar and approached his table. She was hoping that satisfying his attitude would put him in a good mood. With his back to the bar he didn't see her arrival, Dean did however and he excused himself as he saw her approach. He patted a still unaware Dean on the shoulder as he walked over to Ash, Dean followed him with his eyes and came face to face with Jo. He'll never be able to explain why it was that he stood when he saw her, but like the gentleman he never knew he had in him he rose to greet her.

"Hey."

"Hey, you wanna sit?"

"Yeah." They were both awkward with each other, Dean had been planning for a happy reunion but upon seeing her all the things he had planned to say had escaped him. "How was the hunt?"

"It was good, normal stuff." A pause, "How are you?" He could barely look at her, what if she wouldn't forgive him, he was an ass when she told him, he didn't deserve her forgiveness.

"Are we really gonna do this? Exchange pleasantries like we barely know each other?" She couldn't have hid her irritation even if she had wanted to, she had come over here to have a serious talk, she wanted to get it over with.

"I'm sorry." It was a simple statement, and the only place he knew where to start, at the expression on her face he guessed it was the last thing she expected him to say.

"You're sorry?" She was aware of her surroundings which was the only reason she managed not to raise her voice. She had spent a life time surrounded by these people, she was not going to provide them with their entertainment now.

"I shouldn't have reacted like that."

"No." She said, "You shouldn't" She knew she wasn't being fair, he reacted the way most guys with a pregnant none girlfriend probably would have reacted. Still she was the one who was pregnant and he hadn't once asked how she felt about it all.

"It was a shock, and it's not like I'm the most together guy at the best of times." He paused.

"Go on."

"I overreacted. I've had time to think about it, and I've decided maybe this isn't such a bad thing." He flashes that charming grin but it doesn't seem to do him any good.

"Please don't do me any favours." She wasn't meaning to sound so angry , and she didn't really know where it was coming from.

"Jo." He's exasperated, in his mind this was supposed to be an easy conversation.

"Look Dean, I would really love for you to be in this with me, but I want it to be something that you want to do. I'm not ready for this baby and I sure as Hell didn't want one with a guy I'm really not sure is even into me…"

"Of course I'm into you."

"Let me finish, the point is I'm not ready, but this is happening, but it's happening to me. If you don't wanna be a part of this, then just go. I wont hold it against you, I wont resent you or hit you up for money, just go. But do it now, don't wait until further down the line when I'm starting to need you."

He can tell she's trying to work up the strength to say something else, he can't let it get beyond his control. "What if I don't want that?"

For a second she's confused, she hadn't expected him to say anything and it throws her, "What do you mean?"

"I've been thinking about it and I think maybe I want this." He can't believe how much trouble he's having getting all this out. He's never had trouble speaking to a woman in his life, but then he's never really had to discuss anything real before.

"Maybe doesn't work for me Dean." She looks sad now.

"Look I'm getting all of this wrong, what I'm trying to say is I hadn't put much thought into us, wait that's not it. I mean, I like you, I knew I liked you but what I'm starting to realise is it's more than that. I love you, and I'm not a romantic guy, I don't do hearts and candy, but I do love you. I love being with you, and I want us to do this. Together."

A small smile started to play over her features, but she wouldn't let it break free, she wasn't ready to trust this. "I don't know."

"Marry me Jo." It wasn't a question, and it was a toss-up who was more surprised by it's utterance, but he realised once the words were out that it wasn't the worst idea he'd ever had. She however didn't seem to agree. He looked up at her to see her laughing hysterically, he felt like he had received a dagger to his heart. "I take it that's a no."

The pained expression on his face stops her "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, it's just, we're not the marrying type Dean. Not just you, neither of us." She giggles again, "Wait until I tell my mom about this."

"Hey."

"I'm just kidding. I love you too by the way."

He suddenly adopts a very deep voice, "Yeah."

She giggles again as she gets up from her chair and turns herself to sit in his lap, "Yeah." She kisses him, "We don't have to get married to have a family, this isn't the dark ages."

"You're mom wont kick my ass?"

"Oh she'll definitely kick your ass, but she'd do that anyway. You knocked up her only daughter." She smiles as she kisses him again.

"I think it'll be worth it."


End file.
